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“I thought maybe with grandchildren and as successful as Gene became (he was elected to the NFL Hall of Fame in 1987) time would heal,” she said.

“I wonder, when a birthday or a holiday comes up, do they think about me?

Terri Upshaw says the bitterness from that controversy remains and she has not stayed in contact with the son, who now lives in Florida.

Until this story broke, Upshaw endured the sting of rejection from her San Francisco family in silence.

“In my opinion, they need to clean up their intra-family relationships,” he said. If they don’t they are going to be riding the Wine Train.” That was a reference to the Napa Valley Wine Train fiasco over the summer after employees booted a group of mostly African American women from a ride, claiming they were too loud.I told them, ‘I hope you do, but you know how you were raised here.’ We’re 3,000 miles away and it will probably always remain that way.I’m so blessed by all that I shared with Gene and I never regretted making the decision.” Not that she’s given up on San Francisco. And, she announced, she’d decided to follow him to Washington, where he was starting a job as executive director of the NFL Players Association. “You change your name and you leave.” And that was the end. After decades of silence, she’s not eager to share the family secret that has caused her so much anguish. Her father, Steve Buich, who ran Tadich’s back in the 60s, cut her out of the family the day in 1983 when she told her parents that she’d fallen in love with Raiders offensive lineman Gene Upshaw. That’s just how it was laid out.” “This is unacceptable,” she recalls her father telling her.

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