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Taking advantage of a right that many gay people still can't have — and aren't sure they want — can put a big wedge between yourself and your queer identity and community. If anything, the ease with which I could get hitched to a dude, and the sheer happiness that accompanied that act, makes me even more conscious of what it means to deprive other queer people of that right. That's a conversation that modern society is only just learning how to have: that commitment to one person is a continued choice, and that it's OK and healthy to think other people are cute.Putting on the dress and the ring and legally binding yourself to a person of the opposite sex can wreak havoc not only on your gay credentials but on your own self-perception. Am I turning my back on the struggle of a minority? And then there's the concept that a lifetime with only one set of genitals for company is inconceivable for bisexual people. I've had some very concerned dialogues go something like this:"But how can you be happy with just one gender? I don't feel any mourning for my access to breasts, any more than I mourn for my access to other dudes. If I felt any urge to still be out squeezing them, I would not have walked down that aisle.Here are the four ideas about marriage and bisexuality that I regularly encounter, and why they're wrong: More than one person has assumed that bi-hetero relationships must involve threesomes, regularly. Except that it meant that a drunk girl at a party we both attended, who'd never met me but who had heard that I was bi and therefore "must be up for it," tried to force her way into the room where we were sleeping for an unexpected menage a trois. Committing to a lifelong heterosexual relationship when you've been a part of the queer community can cause conversations like this:"Why didn't I get an invite to your Pride party this year? It's also frankly frustrating when anybody, straight or gay, assumes that I have been magically, permanently cured of my (very real) attraction to boobs by prolonged exposure to my dude's heterosexuality, like it's musky anti-LGBT radiation.In the same way that straight relationships involve, I don't know, Chinese food, or fighting over the remote. Obviously there are many things wrong with that situation. Sexuality is fluid, and it can change over time, but assuming this in another person is a good way to get something thrown at your head.He prefers the term "heterosexual," or, if you want to be precise, a male-identifying person who is female-attracted.Totally confidential, it is free to join and if you are looking for a married women seeking men to fool around with in your local area you simply have to try this new discreet housewife affairs dating every married man looking for married women is suitable for having an affair and extramarital affairs are not a substitute for either fixing a marriage (or finishing a marriage if it is beyond repair), because not all affairs have a positive impact on a relationship and some can even be harmful.
The LGBT community and marriage have a very fraught relationship, with a legacy of "traditional" gender roles and inherent historical patriarchy to battle. Marriage is never an "easy" decision, regardless of sexuality, and if I'd fallen in love with a lady, I would have married a lady. Won't your partner think there's a little bit of you he can't satisfy? Attraction to others, regardless of orientation, doesn't cease because you put a ring on it.
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But the underlying assumption, that threesomes are regularly on the sexual menu, isn't too uncommon. And then there are the people who decide I was never actually REALLY queer at all, that I was either a L. G — Lesbian Until Graduation — dating women because it was fashionable and edgy or because I was just confused.
It defines "bisexual" as "can't be satisfied without both sexes at once," which is another, entirely different sexual identity. Nobody's actually congratulated my dude on "turning me" or "helping me make up my mind" — yet. People can be very uncomfortable with the concept of bisexuality as a permanent identity rather than a 'holding pattern' while you choose which gender you REALLY like. "Welcome to a contradiction of bi-and-married existence.